I wish that I had been taught that if you want to be a mom you will have to make choices. Many of us (assuming budgets and spouses are in line) have the choice to work full time and miss some important moments in our children’s lives or be home full time and miss some career opportunities. That we have to make choices is not a bad thing; it just is. One alumna who talked about this was Rose Epstein Frisch ’39. She spoke while I was at Smith about her scientific research (linking body fat to fertility), but the most important thing she said, in my mind, was that she stayed home to raise her four kids—and then she did her groundbreaking research. That showed me a new way of “having it all.” Now I work from home part time as a freelance writer with my infant and toddler.
One thing I’ve learned is that there is no shame in having a mail-order life. Recently, when my hands were full and my husband was working around the clock, I used a gourmet meal-delivery service and a personal styling service. Food on the table? Check. Clothes that fit? Check.
And remember, kids love babysitters! Moms feel like they’re abandoning their forlorn children to strangers, but kids feel like they’re getting the jackpot: a young, fun teenager full of energy to spend only on them! Moms, take a break. You’ll come back happier and your kids will be happier, too.
—Lindsey Rowe Roberts ’06, two children, 9 months and 2½
SAQ, Winter 2015–16